Just Counting

I was just sitting there holding the baby. I knew I needed to give him back to his mama and go back to the barn. Then I heard the screaming. Ann was coming up from the barn with Anna. I couldn’t register what she was saying. A horse was dying. I need to care for Anna. What horse? Where? My mind froze. Then I saw my oldest girl covered in dirt, and I moved to action. I handed the baby to his mom, and I took Anna’s arm. Her face had dirt all on one side and tears were streaming down her face. She kept saying, “My horse is dying!” I felt her bones in her arms, legs, and looked in her eyes. I had her turn around. She said her ribs hurt. Kristen said we should get her in the shower.

I helped her get in the bathroom to get the dirt off. She didn’t appear to have broken bones, but there were scrapes and redness all over. She was crying. She said, “He might be dying, Mom.” Just then my husband cracked the bathroom door, “Anna, Grasshopper died.” She cried louder. We got her into the living room, and Matt moved the flashlight over her eyes. Her pupils were very responsive. “Okay, let’s go say goodbye, Sweetie,” he said gently.

I held her hand as we went out the door. She didn’t want any shoes. I thought about her bare feet as we walked through the barn, but dirty feet didn’t deserve my time. The arena lights were out, and Anna was still holding my hand. Matt knelt down in front of the horse. I put my hand on his neck. He was still warm. Anna laid on him and sobbed. “He was a good horse,” Matt said.

She had been riding him at a walking pace, and he just went down. The vet said it was probably an aneurism. The way he went down, Anna got pinned under him. He was writhing in pain, and my husband tried to get him off of her. My father-in-law and he were only able to turn him so my mother-in-law could pull Anna out. She is only bruised. The horse died a few minutes later.

Our Friday was traumatic. The next day, I was just thankful and watchful of my girl. But by Saturday night I threw a tantrum and whined….a lot. I just needed to confess that to you. It needs confessing.Our little one is whining a lot lately. I declared that I need to work on this with her. I guess I need to work on it too. Parenting is not for sissies in case you wondered. But, what do you do with an adult tantrum? Sigh. Confess. Be sad when your shadow side shows itself. Open your arms and forgive. That’s all.

After these days, I just need to count the thanks today, people. It’s the thing to do.

419. My girl okay after a 1400 pound animal fell on her.

420. coconut ice cream…I have noticed a lot of my thanks has to do with food. I just wanted you to know that I’ve noticed too.

421. Carnival Night

422. evening prayers done in the morning

423. Vacation motivation to work hard–this drawing by my 6-year-old

424. Talking with Mom…even listening to the latest leukemia symptoms (hard thanks)

425. Good horses

426. Caring friends

427. blooming Spring

428. weaknesses acknowledged

429. Anna…back on a horse by Sunday

430. Remembering that taking risk is part of real living.


Join me in giving thanks!



8 thoughts on “Just Counting

  1. Anna told me about this story yesterday. She told it with such maturity and a straight face about how Grasshopper was in a better place. Hugs to her and all of you. She is growing up, Mamma.

  2. I”m so glad she’s okay. She’s going to be so appreciative that you wrote this one down for her someday.

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