Your Mom

This is a repost from my archives. I was flipping through and thought it deserved a second chance especially since I am trying to finish the book this week. Writing a book is brutal at times, by the way. Also, your mom deserves a second chance.

Your mom’s writing a book.

Your mom goes to college.

Your mom eats yogurt.

Your mom takes the trash out.

Your mom cleans dog vomit.

Your mom washes dishes.

Your mom’s on jury duty.

Your mom buys clothes.

Your mom sweeps.

Your mom goes to conferences.

Your mom shaves.

Your mom’s funny.

Your mom cleans the toilet.

Your mom’s ticked.

Your mom eats waffles.

Your mom does yoga.

I figured out a way to make a list of everything I do for my children so they will appreciate me! See, the key is to not do it in a nagging format. Or whining. You think it’s bad when they whine? I know it’s not fair but kids usually have a zero tolerance program for parental whining. Yeah, so here’s what you do: Anytime you ask them to do something and they complain, do a “Your mom” joke with what they said (after you tell them to do what you said and I mean it, mister).

A) It’s funny. B) You get to brag on your own work. Get it? Because it’s you that you’re talking about! Hahaha!

The only problem is when they figure it out. Durn kids are too smart these days. They catch on quick, and then they sometimes roll their eyes and say…”You know you’re joking about yourself, right Mom?” If this happens, just smile and nod and say, “Your mom’s a joker.”

You won’t survive parenting if you can”t laugh sometimes. Believe me.

OH, and your mom laughs.

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